tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-319183812024-03-06T22:09:03.189-08:00Borne To TravelPerhentian Islands - May 2011Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.comBlogger363125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-41957437253788655122012-03-19T07:13:00.000-07:002012-03-19T07:13:00.236-07:00Guess who's ONE ... already!!!I don't think I ever got around to blogging about one of the coolest events of my life (because I was being a terrible blogger at that point). Anyway, I'll try to cath you up now. A year ago, I got to watch this little guy be born. His Mom and Dad were awesome enough to allow me to be in the delivery room. It. Was. Fascinating! That's honestly the best word I can use to describe it. If they would've let me, I would've pulled him out myself. When I was up beside my best friend rubbing her head and trying to be somewhat supportive, it was super hard to watch her be in so much pain, but when the baby got stuck and Daddy came to stand beside her and be her support, I wasn't sure exactly where to stand. Well, I ended up having a front row seat to watching his entry into the world. I'll be honest ... I kinda forgot that I was watching my BFF go through this. I was so enthralled by what was going on that I just took it all in ... and captured it all on film. I know, some of you are mortified at the thought and don't worry, I won't subject you to any of the pics, but that's what I was told I was asked to be there for ... to take pictures ... and I fulfilled my duty. No, I don't look at Jennie in a different way now. Well, that's not to say that I don't think she's the most courageous, strong, amazing woman. Some people have asked if we look at each other <em>weirdly</em> now that I've seen that <em>side</em> of her. You'll have to ask her how she feels, but I only feel more love for her after I've seen what she's been through. She's awesome and I'm SO glad I got to be a part of it.<br /><br />Anyway, I can't believe a whole year has gone by already! Seriously, where did this year go?<br /><br />I got some pics of him yesterday at his party. He doesn't sit still for long! Closer, closer ... let me have that picture taking thingy!<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTPG1R_AXoEDNQCDN2TmBbtxKZP6lxrmKDS8BtD-Dm5ZTGYCpt-zODQcu9SwRhNv_zYJygCZgb9MBzIoxviU_yj5TVLMaWbISOYwATMIHQfql_bHGFPJW52mOnl5Eih_2k7sw34Q/s1600/IMG_1288.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5721478766641962818" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTPG1R_AXoEDNQCDN2TmBbtxKZP6lxrmKDS8BtD-Dm5ZTGYCpt-zODQcu9SwRhNv_zYJygCZgb9MBzIoxviU_yj5TVLMaWbISOYwATMIHQfql_bHGFPJW52mOnl5Eih_2k7sw34Q/s400/IMG_1288.JPG" /></a> And then it was cake time.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOmlwPeqHX5EuVVoOXjYfeHlU7Ts00OctldaePVJU4JAUhdkIhs7FaFb-ooGugnCDtdmoymUr7fEgzCSIWXFzMpBrsHND676XOaJy0jScQFhdwEmhe8FJaytADcJLT2uCGsHDEgA/s1600/IMG_1262.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 299px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5721478749374500818" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOmlwPeqHX5EuVVoOXjYfeHlU7Ts00OctldaePVJU4JAUhdkIhs7FaFb-ooGugnCDtdmoymUr7fEgzCSIWXFzMpBrsHND676XOaJy0jScQFhdwEmhe8FJaytADcJLT2uCGsHDEgA/s400/IMG_1262.JPG" /></a> His first time having sweets.<br /><br /><br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCff9U2WVUYu4Fx0NQxXeu26YEqu40bx7XaYyyOQ0qbXSFwkf1gy9aW6YKzTSO29TbcloPmW3JS4dsp3NCYHGeeeZ7R9G2wr-is5NFu_R5ZzUsNxxcylyyQmH2JUB6_QQyyqLYbQ/s1600/IMG_1264.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 299px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5721478741994316402" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCff9U2WVUYu4Fx0NQxXeu26YEqu40bx7XaYyyOQ0qbXSFwkf1gy9aW6YKzTSO29TbcloPmW3JS4dsp3NCYHGeeeZ7R9G2wr-is5NFu_R5ZzUsNxxcylyyQmH2JUB6_QQyyqLYbQ/s400/IMG_1264.JPG" /></a> Let me try this spongy thing ...<br /><br /><br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0VhEJXP6dhGbJpfL0iryZ4C5jvsn1uNmq34D7JcvL66pzSDliWHvx-d3fPuQPsOH2GJFuZvp0pP0TXHvMNRKHyCttJrSpOBCrsvrdrIpR-M99QCQOmF0g0wglMgkIeJK_NclvRQ/s1600/IMG_1265.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 299px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5721478733628816498" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0VhEJXP6dhGbJpfL0iryZ4C5jvsn1uNmq34D7JcvL66pzSDliWHvx-d3fPuQPsOH2GJFuZvp0pP0TXHvMNRKHyCttJrSpOBCrsvrdrIpR-M99QCQOmF0g0wglMgkIeJK_NclvRQ/s400/IMG_1265.JPG" /></a> Wow! This is amazing! I need more of this RIGHT NOW!<br /><br /><br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_Ea5cWUOD-qaArf0uufnVSFI28mofcFFBQ_3ipRsEpjSFZltxxoG_o0PVUKMM7LRuAlGXbZ_0qYpLTfKZ18N3Zpdm31yTUWY8kSXL6BdT7lQ45QQTq3djaPsc8p5rTIxV29LNpA/s1600/IMG_1267.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 299px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5721477978643749890" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_Ea5cWUOD-qaArf0uufnVSFI28mofcFFBQ_3ipRsEpjSFZltxxoG_o0PVUKMM7LRuAlGXbZ_0qYpLTfKZ18N3Zpdm31yTUWY8kSXL6BdT7lQ45QQTq3djaPsc8p5rTIxV29LNpA/s400/IMG_1267.JPG" /></a>Yup, I'm going in again. I think we have a winner, people!<br /><br /><br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrNFzgrjyE8XNpHD5ZKseacg5Df2p8-jVWYLYpT91YsUy6Oipq7besuK070VigaVBVAeTTnW2jzvOmqUTA6JxDJX9rw6B4p6vHTj5yyRYD2rC6hPtKU_GMdHIGNm8uf_6_RNs-hA/s1600/IMG_1269.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 299px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5721477969685840066" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrNFzgrjyE8XNpHD5ZKseacg5Df2p8-jVWYLYpT91YsUy6Oipq7besuK070VigaVBVAeTTnW2jzvOmqUTA6JxDJX9rw6B4p6vHTj5yyRYD2rC6hPtKU_GMdHIGNm8uf_6_RNs-hA/s400/IMG_1269.JPG" /></a> I couldn't resist the cute, little, striped cardigan, sweater and shoes that I saw in the store. I knew they MUST be his! :)<br /><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 192px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5721476946145705650" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQV6sH8iW603I1J_Pl5TXzDTGpQX9AAp0HJj0qMz1LdZXoKjr8Qs0D5q9J4ZaLziIhWfy8_-vwG6YqWCYovjV6zBKSHsm8c5xY3b0gKH2DyX_-CelPWWrLquuuqPSXj5de7z-1eA/s400/IMG_1282a.jpg" />Nathanael, I can't believe that you went from this ...</div><br /><div><br /><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 300px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5721477962433921986" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJ3ADcyjZh5bEFd7uUCD4lVxjA6pcqC9MXJjSOn09HsEbcIKDsuthi3kRk0NU_nl-Cs6tgXUyMXwF2yi9nTMX5tvmTghv6LE_KWWwrTr0NthQbiFZjHpb-ENkUuINFh4J2Xj4j0w/s400/DSC05789.JPG" />and this ...<br /><br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUut8ywgN-S1jArxvO3vn4DWFBYuzN7izqiItHZX5lQXJpUBFS7pfNZI6EU2sGbRs8LlsIvTm60OhvCboT7dY_WMI0vDFHse4BRX43oEXImTKLuHKrqHb-V3QIPm4X4ZOeAKnzTA/s1600/DSC05894.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 300px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5721477964857961378" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUut8ywgN-S1jArxvO3vn4DWFBYuzN7izqiItHZX5lQXJpUBFS7pfNZI6EU2sGbRs8LlsIvTm60OhvCboT7dY_WMI0vDFHse4BRX43oEXImTKLuHKrqHb-V3QIPm4X4ZOeAKnzTA/s400/DSC05894.JPG" /></a>to this ...<br /><br /><br /><div><br /><div><br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEO6ZEbDgPpjvkgQ67Cwum0hhSEs11T4wW7bpc7jM6ND505IcmmP1fqkuvq3pzkcTZ-mNLo5bjeSSeRYvHnp3Pv9sbqzq3UH5Uw8yzSDDmYQQ6Dq3D6ryKaZ9BdSW1SJJR_X9LRg/s1600/IMG_1286.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 299px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5721476812990110738" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEO6ZEbDgPpjvkgQ67Cwum0hhSEs11T4wW7bpc7jM6ND505IcmmP1fqkuvq3pzkcTZ-mNLo5bjeSSeRYvHnp3Pv9sbqzq3UH5Uw8yzSDDmYQQ6Dq3D6ryKaZ9BdSW1SJJR_X9LRg/s400/IMG_1286.JPG" /></a> so quickly. Happy birthday and I love you, buddy!<br /><br /><br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiABXzu0-JSgia-qzHIZE-0Ru0MkItwMxZtKJb1JcNTgEZyBiIN4x86iYbvyI10FN_1X_BIfUlwChWFUFaNkr0t6fgqb6Zw1DF6dqM1WBPmPqPWc8WMFahcHRhfemRv_6f3XasMFg/s1600/IMG_1287a.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 270px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5721476645039887202" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiABXzu0-JSgia-qzHIZE-0Ru0MkItwMxZtKJb1JcNTgEZyBiIN4x86iYbvyI10FN_1X_BIfUlwChWFUFaNkr0t6fgqb6Zw1DF6dqM1WBPmPqPWc8WMFahcHRhfemRv_6f3XasMFg/s400/IMG_1287a.jpg" /></a> </div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div></div>Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-30083604989991908262012-03-14T06:29:00.004-07:002012-03-16T06:46:20.085-07:00Words of Wisdom from Janet ... Miss Jackson if you're nasty!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4Kk5kCqS7c-UzfXvpE4AjO0WojhcBl5PtIDW5EhN4OuFnxAl4zfQOsVi6t1rMif4r9um4E61PiE5rB1kUuFpgYBQFp8OnY2v5sBWFdOEJTtNoumEHz3D3NqhSw7fWvZCppgtsmA/s1600/true%252520you_grid-4x2.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 266px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5719744383541396370" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4Kk5kCqS7c-UzfXvpE4AjO0WojhcBl5PtIDW5EhN4OuFnxAl4zfQOsVi6t1rMif4r9um4E61PiE5rB1kUuFpgYBQFp8OnY2v5sBWFdOEJTtNoumEHz3D3NqhSw7fWvZCppgtsmA/s400/true%252520you_grid-4x2.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><blockquote>I'm still attracted to control, but I also know that an attraction can turn into an addiction. The more I have, the more I want. Just as there is no drink that will set the alcholic free, no drug to liberate the junkie, there is no amount of control that will satisfy that kind of freak. Only God is in total control. Not me, not you, not anyone.<br /><br />Literally, the velvet rope is the barrier that keeps partygoers outside a nightclub from getting to where they want to be. You can look at these partygoers in many ways, however. It's those people who simply want to have fun but are unable to gain admission to the fun room. It can also be those people who are seeking relief from the weight of their problems, and people looking to belong. To get beyond that rope - at least the rope that exists in my imagination - requires, in the words of the songs, not putting people down, but rather freeing ourselves from feelings of hatred and oppression.<br /><br />I believe we're either moving forward or moving backward. "That applies almost to everything," my friend explained. "We can change cities, countries, and hair colors, but nothing changes until we figure out how to change our attitude and belief system. We move backward when we keep doing the same things and expect a different result. We get discouraged and fall into despair. Superficial external moves - like a new wardrobe or a new apartment - just have us moving from side to side. Different scenery, some sensibility. Be careful, because all of that may be just smoke and mirrors, because it's not going to cure your pain. But to move up, to gain a higher consciousness and a more effective way to deal with our problems - that requires faith. Faith in something bigger than yourself."<br /><br />My growth depends on faith, as it must for everyone else as well. My spirit of generosity and selflessness also depend on faith. I'm grateful for the comfort that my work provides. I'm grateful for the privileged life that I lead. But I realize that it's the spiritual life that sustains, that nourishes us. In the early morning hours, when I read my Bible, when I pray, when I talk to Jesus, I'm no longer haunted by remorse. I know that the mistakes I've made are in the past; they're gone, forgiven, and no longer cause for guilt or shame. I'm looking forward, not behind.</blockquote><br />These words have reminded me yet again that everyone's relationship with God is different and their own. You may not agree with how they live it out, but that doesn't mean they don't know God in their own way. I'm finding the same thing as I read Kris Jenner's book and learn that she went to Bible Study at Pat Boone's place in the 80s and became a born again Christian. It always urks me when I tell people that I've read/heard that Bono's a Christian and they say, "No he's not." How do you know? You may think I'm naive when I read these things and believe that these people are Christians, but who am I to judge them? If they're saying it but they really aren't, God will convict them of that and deal with it Himself. I think I've talked about how much I loved the book Blue Like Jazz. It blew the little box I was living in apart and opened my eyes up to the fact that everyone's journey is different and you have no idea where they've come from, so let go of the judgment. These two books were a great reminder of that. I think we may be surprised by who we meet in Heaven. :)Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-49205126338402447912012-03-05T08:52:00.006-08:002012-03-05T09:43:39.518-08:00Bossypants<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5QeDGmd2pBJlCHVLUULQxfx1U3hNDev6OULBsQcq9VytKERxdOobY3NbnebJmf4rBhtAMvAq1bhvEV2tkKGGB2vC61tgyPHIvhg4VRCrT3goBSQyeCpcBLYspSNX_eaeknPNV-g/s1600/TinaFeyBossyPants.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 300px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 300px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5716457270956760018" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5QeDGmd2pBJlCHVLUULQxfx1U3hNDev6OULBsQcq9VytKERxdOobY3NbnebJmf4rBhtAMvAq1bhvEV2tkKGGB2vC61tgyPHIvhg4VRCrT3goBSQyeCpcBLYspSNX_eaeknPNV-g/s400/TinaFeyBossyPants.jpg" /></a> Unless you live under a rock (make that 30 Rock - hardy har har), you will most likely have heard of Tina Fey. Funny, funny lady. I first grew to love her when she did Weekend Update with Jimmy Falon on SNL. Their chemistry was SO hilarious together! I was actually quite sad when she left SNL. I've watched a few episodes of 30 Rock and they are definitely funny, but I've got so many other shows that I watch, I haven't yet put it into full repitoire in my TV schedule. I know ... I'm lame. When she came back to SNL to parody Sarah Palin, she was an instant hit. No matter your thoughts on Sarah Palin, love her or hate her, Tina nailed it!<br /><br />When I heard about Bossypants, all I heard was how funny it is ... so naturally, when I needed a break after all the trauma/drama of The Hunger Games, I picked it up. Here are a few of my favorite parts:<br /><br /><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">The 70s were a small-eyed, thin-lipped blond woman's paradise. I remember watching <em>Three's Company </em>as a little brown-haired kid thinking, "Really? This is what we get? Joyce DeWitt is our brunet representative? She's got that greasy-looking bowl cut and they make her wear suntan pantyhose under her football jersey nightshirt." I may have only been seven or eight, but I knew that this sucked ... (in the middle here she goes on a long, funny rant about being different and in the end how that's a good thing) ... And if I ever meet Joyce DeWitt, I will first apologize to her for having immediately punched her in the face, and then I will thank her. For while she looked like a Liza Minnelli doll that had been damaged in a fire, at least she didn't look like everybody else on TV.<br /></span><br /><span style="font-family:times new roman;">Ah, babies! They're more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts.<br /><br /></span><span style="font-family:verdana;">When people say, "You really, really <em>must"</em> do something, it means you don't really have to. No one ever says, "You really, really <em>must</em> deliver the baby during labour." When it's true, it doesn't need to be said. (this came about after a funny part about women who tell you that you <em>must</em> breast feed)<br /></span><br />And then her prayer for her daughter is quite hilarious ... but too long to put all here, so click <a href="http://melodygodfred.com/2011/04/15/a-mothers-prayer-for-its-child-by-tina-fey/">HERE</a> and you can read it. Now that I'm skimming back through the book, there are so many parts I'd like for you to read, but to just pick a couple of lines doesn't do the whole chapter justice, so I'd recommend you do what I do and go to your local library and pick it up.<br /><br />For some reason I'm on a biography kick right now. I'm currently reading Janet Jackson's <em>True You</em>, my library just emailed me to let me know that Kris Jenner's <em>and All Things Kardashian</em> is in (don't judge me) and I've still got Ellen DeGeneres' <em>Seriously, I'm Kidding</em> on my hold list (I'm #97 on the hold list, so I'm sure I'll get to read that one sometime in 2015) and next I'm going to ask for Rob Lowe's <em>Stories I Only Tell My Friends.</em> With all the old 80s clothes coming back in style (which I'm having a hard time with) and starting to celebrate my friends 40th birthdays while reminiscing about old times and dancing to 80s music, I'm reminded of The Outsiders and how all those cute boys were "nobody's" back then and I want to read about what Rob's got to say about that era ... which is probably also why I'm reading Janet Jackson's book right now. Her albums <em>Control</em> and <em>Rhythm Nation</em> were playing constantly on my tape deck in the 80s. Aaaaahhhh, good times.<br /><br />Anyway, all that to say, go pick up Tina Fey's <em>Bossypants</em>. You won't regret it.Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-41215704182465037602012-02-16T21:03:00.000-08:002012-02-16T22:13:03.704-08:00V-day cupcakesWhen Danielle told me she needed 48 cupcakes for her class for Valentine's Day, I thought that sounded like a lot, but I told her we'd give it a try. I'd seen a great idea on Pinterest to make cupcakes into heart shapes ... I couldn't find a marble like they suggested, but their 2nd suggestion was to crumple up tin foil and put it between the tray and the paper liner.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4ugCCE6Hg5JOQ1VLyPM6aK6BDyGKnj79JCYnYeMggYC_Hdjo0m1nFIkYXG5Cm0ipmU0UlTywxTe3CaVc75NbJuRBl2TyB7qt8Aek0iBKPXxFcCueJ-IvH9z3jxPmOpe66CX2Ghw/s1600/419498_10150676605131257_715106256_11499941_1430093667_n.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5709981254652230082" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4ugCCE6Hg5JOQ1VLyPM6aK6BDyGKnj79JCYnYeMggYC_Hdjo0m1nFIkYXG5Cm0ipmU0UlTywxTe3CaVc75NbJuRBl2TyB7qt8Aek0iBKPXxFcCueJ-IvH9z3jxPmOpe66CX2Ghw/s400/419498_10150676605131257_715106256_11499941_1430093667_n.jpg" /></a>We separated the batter into 3 bowls, left one bowl white, poured a little bit of red food colouring into another one to make pink and the last one we poured double the amount of food colouring in to make red. Then we started drizzling away in all the liners to make multi coloured cupcakes. I thought it would be fun to have a dab of colour in the middle and by accident, one looked like a heart, so from then on, I purposely drizzled a heart in the middle. Here's to hoping it would work!<br /><br />Well, it took us quite some time, but we managed to make 48 cupcakes. We had just enough time to clean up while ...<br /><br /><br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgI3eOnXVY5vfxfvQHNb8wT4gDnW4yvzf78aBnkNLyDBsPpHm2McSk55n7OAp0H3N-M1BsQiz9yzLqk-0fFPYstfplNYLPglZS_qklleo468FWaKt81g38g8VVwu_yVwSduV031Q/s1600/398512_10150676729091257_715106256_11500122_879592888_n.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 299px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5709981245960335842" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgI3eOnXVY5vfxfvQHNb8wT4gDnW4yvzf78aBnkNLyDBsPpHm2McSk55n7OAp0H3N-M1BsQiz9yzLqk-0fFPYstfplNYLPglZS_qklleo468FWaKt81g38g8VVwu_yVwSduV031Q/s400/398512_10150676729091257_715106256_11500122_879592888_n.jpg" /></a> the last batch was in the oven.<br /><br /><br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOGNJTo4PzQjWdZ5APSclgUuaaXbhnxeOB6KA10quR6Ie0H9WAEDkl0MVnc9cScsvz0p2lLbXHWfzm4Xd1ma2b9FAHfaQk6h5uB4s9ebAM_PSK3a26DBYkILEU2e4f8TwGZ8Us7g/s1600/423264_10150676717326257_611987364_n.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5709981242348979314" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOGNJTo4PzQjWdZ5APSclgUuaaXbhnxeOB6KA10quR6Ie0H9WAEDkl0MVnc9cScsvz0p2lLbXHWfzm4Xd1ma2b9FAHfaQk6h5uB4s9ebAM_PSK3a26DBYkILEU2e4f8TwGZ8Us7g/s400/423264_10150676717326257_611987364_n.jpg" /></a> We were VERY pleased with how they turned out. I haven't seen her since she took them to class on Tuesday, but I'm hoping they were a hit.<br /><br /><br /><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi21DcHuHcN3MmMiMjkiARQxAKX2Lb2WXLLFDGhIScmznDPp377VDDoLKAl_QBeC7MEgxaUnYlaFGPUOpqT45pLx3PAqZ3TYqfs8oyESCXoGxdz2FWjuxVgCLVlFmM3SNJQNMqegA/s1600/429748_10150676688246257_715106256_11500045_1050459688_n.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5709981236092307170" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi21DcHuHcN3MmMiMjkiARQxAKX2Lb2WXLLFDGhIScmznDPp377VDDoLKAl_QBeC7MEgxaUnYlaFGPUOpqT45pLx3PAqZ3TYqfs8oyESCXoGxdz2FWjuxVgCLVlFmM3SNJQNMqegA/s400/429748_10150676688246257_715106256_11500045_1050459688_n.jpg" /></a>My Valentine's gift this year was quite heavenly. While out for a walk that night, I saw this:<br /><br /><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5709983009745904530" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgchiVPHYR0nuUfVQMyWZY8zZ9fwVEc0a__YnF6yaPeR-inJocIob9NQIMsVA1LuLH87BbEYOKkrsAzdR437pTmbsN8hrGgy_BOARJqlOqoeUicEZ7G1m-9aaNBjcx-R5-UeF8wWw/s400/426611_10150679451236257_715106256_11507411_485238420_n.jpg" /><br /><br /><div>That was definitely gift enough for me. Stunning.</div></div></div></div>Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-518645598419707222012-02-10T06:07:00.000-08:002012-02-10T06:07:01.175-08:00Show of hands, pleaseHypothetically speaking, who thinks it would be weird to date your cousins widower?<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEji1m2W5EjEIjud_hpDJO_W1q0ptuuc_YSS7In-z8WTDrIPg5Nj60MKaxLu7GA3DDbjaOrZLNl7ahht_hTByf6GVy3Jvv_cX5pkxmX3d6cPhIIm281TSAZOTOGcqVddxETXjlCg5Q/s1600/Clss_065.gif"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 270px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5707369203636917394" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEji1m2W5EjEIjud_hpDJO_W1q0ptuuc_YSS7In-z8WTDrIPg5Nj60MKaxLu7GA3DDbjaOrZLNl7ahht_hTByf6GVy3Jvv_cX5pkxmX3d6cPhIIm281TSAZOTOGcqVddxETXjlCg5Q/s400/Clss_065.gif" /></a> I mean, hypothetically speaking, I'm sure someone's parents are well intentioned, but seriously? Come on ... am I the only one that thinks that would be weird? Please, help me out, here. I'm trying to prove a point .... hypothetically speaking, of course.Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-10272658869325916812012-02-06T19:28:00.000-08:002012-02-06T19:39:19.539-08:00ResultsAfter feeling like I was going a little mental for the last couple of months, I went to my doc to have a chat and tell him what's been going on. The thing I love about my doc is that he doesn't make me feel stupid or tell me that it's all in my head. He takes me seriously and sends me for tests. Today I got those results. I'm perfectly healthy. "So, I'm just going crazy?" I asked him. "Looks like it," he said, then laughed. No thyroid problem. Hormone levels are "really quite good" he said. I don't have asthma (I've been having a cough that reminded me of the 100 day cough I had a couple of years ago). So, what now?<br /><br />Well, he's going to test me for sleep apnea. I told him that I sleep quite well, actually and it makes me wonder why I'm so tired all the time. He said he's going to check if I'm breathing properly while I'm sleeping. He said it can seem like a person gets a full nights sleep, but if you're not breathing properly while sleeping, it can make you tired when you wake up. So, that's next. <br /><br />I've been having something weird happen with my eyes. He sent me to an Ophthalmologist and he prescribed glasses. I've been wearing the glasses for 2 months now and it's mostly the same, but a few times it's gotten worse. Now I have 2 appointments downtown with another specialist. Aaaaah, ain't getting older grand?<br /><br />Part of me feels like I'm falling apart and the other part of me knows it could be must worse. I'll just bide my time and do what the doc says for now and stay positive ... and get out for more exercise now that the sun's been shining!Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-77266086301024403562012-02-03T16:09:00.000-08:002012-02-03T16:23:11.840-08:00I'll take what I can get!So, my parents are in town for a few days and although it's not unusual for my Dad to call me, most of the time it's my Mom. I heard my phone ring and saw that it said, "Dad's Cell." I figured it was my Mom letting me know that they'd gotten here safely and to set up a time to see me ... yes, I have to schedule time with my parents when they come here. They used to live here for many years plus they have a lot of family here, so I'm lucky if I get to see them twice while they're here. I'm not complaining ... I'm glad they've got friends ... it might just be a tad embarrassing that my parents are busier than me! haha! JK<br /><br />Anyway, when I answer the phone, I'm a little surprised to hear Dad's voice on the other end. We chit chat about their drive out here for a bit and then he says, "What are you doing on Sunday around 4:00?" My mind quickly peruses my schedule but before I say anything, I had this fleeting thought ... "Is there a Canucks game on Sunday? Does he want to take me to a Canucks game? Sweet!" I calmly say, "Nothing. Why?" to which he answers, "Well, there's a certain football game on that I want to watch" and then it hits me ... he wants to use me for my TV! (they're staying at my Uncle and Aunt's place who have a very old, small TV) haha! Well, I was right about it having something to do with a sporting event! :) I said, "Are you wanting to watch it on my TV, Dad?" "I need a nice, big screen to watch it on!" he says in a whiny tone. "Of course, Dad. Come on over."<br /><br />I hope this doesn't sound like I'm offended, because I'm totally not. My Mom will, of course, come with him and her and I will chat and catch up ... maybe play some Banagrams while Dad's watching the game. We'll swap seats when the half time show comes on and I'll wonder what Madge will come up with and he'll think it's "garbage" but it'll be fun. Mom said she's got buns and cold cuts (did she bring them all the way from Alberta? Doesn't she realize we have those things here, too? - they crack me up!). I told her that's great, but we <em>have</em> to have pizza while watching the Superbowl, so I'm sure we'll order in as well. I'm sure Dad will fall asleep at some point, but don't worry, I'll wake him up to see the end.<br /><br />You see, my parents have come out here for a funeral of a long time friend. I know the kids of this man and it really makes me think, "What if that was me?" So, I'm going to cherish this time of watching the 2012 Superbowl with my Dad and playing games with my Mom.<br /><br />What are your plans for the Superbowl?Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-82719663698027113522012-01-12T16:21:00.000-08:002012-01-12T16:21:00.556-08:00A Balanced LifeThe 2nd thing that I believe has helped me have a brighter outlook on life again is getting back a balanced life.<br /><br />I believe that one of the reasons why I was feeling hopeless is because I hadn't been to church in quite awhile. When I came back from Malaysisa in June, summer kicked in and with it, many weekend getaways. Church was put on the back burner. When summer ended, I started feeling like I wasn't supposed to go back to the church where I'd been attending for almost 30 years. This was a very weird feeling for me. Although I had a peace about not going back, what now? I told myself that next Sunday I'll go check out a new church. Sunday came, I woke up to my alarm, but I couldn't get myself to go. That was odd for me. I'd never had a problem going to my old church by myself and I'm not a shy person, so what was the problem? I guess it really was more daunting than I led myself to believe. I found a friend who was also ready to seek out a new church and our search has begun (I'll go into that in another post).<br /><br />It felt good to be back in a community setting ... even if we didn't know many people and it didn't yet feel like "home." At least I was going somewhere and getting fed.<br /><br />In my last session with my awesome counselor, she told me to remember the 4 things that help keep a life balanced: Social, Physical, Intellectual and Spiritual. She said to remain healthy, you should do 2 - 3 of these activities per week. That totally makes sense because I feel I've been doing that lately ... leading to a more positive outlook and a more balanced life. I love when my counselor and I are on the same page. :)Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-18289890542694897532012-01-11T17:07:00.000-08:002012-01-11T17:07:01.520-08:00Joy ... something I was lackingContinuing on with #1 from my last post, here's some more of what I've learned from One Thousand Gifts. Since she says it best, this is all a direct quote from her book. It was such an eye opening moment for me. I hope you like it, too.<br /><br />Luke 22:19 And He took bread, <em>gave thanks</em> and broke it ...<br /><br />In the original language, "He gave thanks" reads "eucharisteo."<br />Eucharisteo = thanksgiving<br />root word - charis = grace<br />derivative - chara = joy<br /><br />Joy. Ah ... yes. I might be needing me some of that. That might be what the quest for more is all about. That has always been the goal of the fullest life - joy. And my life knew exactly how elusive that slippery three letter word, joy, can be. I think of it then again ... the lunge for more. More what? And this was it; I could tell how my whole being responded to that one word. I longed for more life, for more holy joy. But where can I seize this holy grail of joy? Deep chara joy is found only at the table of euCHARisteo - the table of thanksgiving. Is it that simple? Is the height of my chara joy dependant on the depths of my eucharisteo thanks? As long as thanks is possible, then joy is always possible. The holy grail of joy is not in some exotic location or some emotional mountain peak experience. The joy wonder could be here! Here, in the messy, piercing ache of now, joy might be - unbelievably - possible! The only place we need see before we die is this place of seeing God, here and now.Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-13767285707558488542012-01-10T17:30:00.000-08:002012-01-11T20:32:33.712-08:00Continuing on my weird journeyThe question in my last post started creeping into my brain back in late October. I'm glad I didn't post about it then because I think I would've sounded quite hopeless if I had. At first I felt quite void and lifeless when I was asking it. After wrestling with it for a few months, while I'm still asking the same question, "What's the point to my life?" I have hope again. I believe that my friends asking me what's going on was the first step in me being honest with myself that something, in fact, <em>was</em> going on. Then I could start dealing with it. There are 2 things that I believe have helped me have a brighter outlook again.<br /><br />1) I started reading One Thousand Gifts<br />I know that there's controversy around this book and I get it. I really do. However, I'm trying to look past that and really get to the meat of what she's saying. I'm only a few chapters in and here are some of my journal notes:<br /><br />She starts off the book talking about how when her little sister died, her family became closed to "any notion of grace." She started believing "the Serpent's hissing lie" that God isn't good, that He "withholds good from His children, that God does not genuinely, fully love us." I know I haven't had a hard life so some people may say that it's easy for me to not have turned from God, but even now when I'm questioning my point in life, I'm SO glad that I still believe God is a loving, caring God. I'm not mad at Him at all. She goes on to say, "Satan's sin becomes the first sin of all humanity; the sin of ingratitude. Our fall was, has always been and always will be, that we aren't satisfied in God and what He gives." Lord help me NOT to be ungrateful! That was a good wake up call as to why I was really asking myself, "What's the point to life?" Am I unsatisfied with where I'm at? I believe that my answer to that question is no, but then why am I asking what the point is? I'm confused. Maybe I <em>am</em> a little unsatisfied. I'll be honest with God about that and ask Him to really unveil my heart ... since He knows it better than I do!<br /><br />Like I said, I'm only a couple of chapters in on the book, but I've heard that this book talks about keeping a gratitude journal, so even though I haven't gotten to that part of the book yet, I've started one. I don't want to become a spoiled brat that thinks, "God owes me more than this!" I want to live daily and to not live in the future. I find that I really start thinking, "What's the point?" when I start looking too far into the future. I want to live in the moment and to know that God has me exactly where I'm at, at that moment, for a reason. God does nothing without a purpose. I want to choose to live a life of gratitude.<br /><br />I've had a few friends lose a parent over the last year ... 2 within the last month alone. Just before Christmas. As I read the next Chapter of One Thousand Gifts, it talks about living life to the fullest NOW. "How to live the fullest life here that delivers into the full life ever after. Thinking on the beginning of this year, who does He call to come home? Is it me, Lord? May I be ready." Wow ... may I be ready ... those are powerful words. "Will I have lived fully - or just empty? How do we live fully so we are fully ready to die?"<br /><br />I know that death isn't the most uplifting topic to think or talk about, but it's going to happen to all of us sooner or later. I want to be ready and to have truly lived every day to it's potential.<br /><br />I'll write what I've learned about joy tomorrow ...Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-39927942191674969902012-01-09T16:58:00.000-08:002012-01-09T17:26:15.318-08:00What's the Point to Life? Riddle me this ...It's kind of odd that my last post is about death and then I went silent. Did anyone think I'd died? haha - ok, maybe I shouldn't joke about that, but it is kind of ironic, isn't it?<br /><br />Almost right after I posted that, I started going through something internally. A change, if you will. I don't think it's necessarily a bad change, but a change none the less. It's been confusing at times and scary at times. I'd like to fill you in on a bit of it, just to give you a little insight as to why I went silent. Not that I can fully explain it and hopefully you won't be more confused after I'm done, but here it goes.<br /><br />I've been asking God, "What's the point to life?"<br /><br />You may be thinking, "Ooooh, she's turning 40 soon. She's having a mid-life crisis!" and you wouldn't be thinking anything that I haven't already thought myself. Thing is, I'm really not scared of turning 40. I'm really not. I'm already starting to plan my celebration! Anyway, I may very well be going through a mid-life crisis, but I still need to get myself through it and come out happy on the other side. There's so much going on in my head right now that I may have to try to explain this in more than one post. <br /><br />Let me just say off the top that I'm not depressed or angry at God. I completely still believe He's got a plan for my life and that it's the best plan there could be. Him and I are simply just discussing it and working through it together. I'm not one to buy into what society says is "the norm" but yet I've been thinking a lot lately about not being married and not having kids. What's been the point to my life if those things haven't happened to me? As I've started sharing these thoughts with people, I've been surprised to find out that even married people go through this and have asked this same question. To me, it feels like since they HAVE the spouse and the kids, how can they ask it, but they have their own reason for asking it, I guess. It makes me feel a little better, I guess.<br /><br />I do also feel that I'm changing. Not necessarily in a bad way, though. I feel that I've become more of a homebody lately. I'm really enjoying staying home. Some of my friends have started noticing, so I've had to have the "it's not you, it's me" talk with them. Seriously! I know, it sounds like I'm breaking up with them, but I really do want them to know that it's nothing they've done. I still love my friends dearly and I don't want to jeopardize my relationships with any of them. I'm not the worrying type, but there's a small part of me that's scared that when I come out on the other side of whatever it is that I'm going through, they may not like the new me. I know what you're going to say ... "if they're true friends, they'll still be your friend after you come through this" and I get that, but do you see why I worry a little?<br /><br />I think it's helped tremendously that those of you who've noticed my absence have questioned me on it. I want to publicly thank you for doing so in such a loving way that helped me open up and start a dialogue about it. I don't expect anyone to have the magic phrase/answer/do this jig 3 times and stand on your head while doing it solution that will solve the answer to my riddle, but I do enjoy hearing others opinions and takes on things. It helps me process.<br /><br />Like I said, I've got a lot more to say about this, but for today, I'll leave it at this. Thank you for your patience with me.Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-46619584569197234192011-09-06T20:46:00.000-07:002011-09-06T20:49:37.503-07:00QuoteSaw this quote today and thought it was appropriate as per my Loose Ends post.<br /><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 366px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: pointer" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5649459417232984786" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgoKQeNx6UB1yWHZxNyhv4eJ4gxdz9Vrko5v5r2S1D9lzsteEHrguDOIRsqrod_Ye5fvzWviiUKe2iaeibsCpUbmRfdRQoA5QubYjFdzqhc0GH_8wttT6ACxnRM2XJXq96nq9fVA/s400/quote.jpg" />Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-83655654589991547302011-08-29T07:38:00.000-07:002011-09-06T20:39:43.563-07:00PrayI had iTunes on shuffle tonight and this song by Kendall Payne came on and I thought of you all. It may sound like a backhanded prayer, but it's actually quite great. And if you hear her sing it, it sounds like a benediction. It's really beautiful. Here's my prayer for all of you and I'd ask that you would say these prayers for me:<br /><br />I will pray for you now<br />For you have been my faithful friends<br />While the road we walk is difficult indeed<br />I could not ask for more<br />Than what you've already been<br />Only that you would say these prayers for me<br /><br />May your heart break enough<br />That compassion enters in<br />May your strength all be spent upon the weak<br />All the castles and crowns you build<br />And place upon your head<br />May they all fall, come crashing down<br />Around your feet<br /><br />May you find every step<br />To be harder than the last<br />So you character grows<br />Greater each stride<br />May your company be<br />Of humble insignificance<br />May your weakness be your<br />only source of pride<br /><br />What you do unto others<br />May it all be done to you<br />May you meet the One who made us<br />And see Him smile when life is through<br />May your blessings be many<br />But not what you'd hope they'd be<br />When you look upon the broken<br />May mercy show you<br />What you could not see<br /><br />May you never be sure<br />Of any plan you desire<br />But you'd learn to truth the plan<br />He has for you<br />May your passions be tried and<br />Tested in the holy fire<br />May you fight with all your life<br />For what is true<br /><br />I have prayed for you now<br />All of my dear and faithful friends<br />But what I wish is more<br />Than I could ever speak<br />As the way wanders on<br />I'll long to see you once again<br />Until then, would you say<br />These prayers for me?<br />Oh that you would pray for meFionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-29595518325658515342011-08-27T08:55:00.000-07:002011-08-27T13:27:27.869-07:00Loose endsSo, Thursday night I was having these weird sharp pains in my head throughout the evening. I didn’t have a headache, but all of a sudden I’d have this make-you-grab-your-head-and-say-Oooooouuuuch kind of pain and then it would be gone just as fast. Out of nowhere, kind of pain. I didn’t think much of it until I laid my head on my pillow and then it’s just you and your thoughts, right? Well, I don’t think I mentioned it here on my blog, but I had a friend pass away in June from a brain haemorrhage. I’m not going to get too dramatic on you here, but I did start thinking about what he went through before it happened, which then made me think about what if it happened to me during the night. Yes, it would be nice to go while I’m sleeping so I wouldn’t know what hit me, but am I <em>ready</em> to go?
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<br />I’ve been quite vocal about not being afraid to die, because if God’s promises about what Heaven is going to be like are true, why would I be afraid to go there? It’s going to be a MILLION times better than what I’m experiencing on earth and I’m pretty happy with life here, so WOW! I can’t even fathom what Heaven will be like. I always follow it up with, “Don’t worry. I won’t do anything to hurry along the process. Only in God’s timing,” but I got thinking about God’s timing. We don’t know when that will be as proven by my very healthy friend who passed away just months ago out of nowhere. I’m not trying to scare anyone here, but really ... we have no idea when our time will come and I realize that I don’t have kids or a spouse to leave behind so it’s different for me. I do realize that.
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<br />Anyway, back to my point. I started thinking seriously about if I were to die that night, would I be ready? Do I have any loose ends that need to be tied up ... and after wracking my brain, my answer was no. I really do feel that if there’s anyone that I feel I’ve had issues with or has had issues with me, I’ve tried my best to clear them up. I kept searching my brain and prayed for God to bring someone or something to mind that I hadn’t done, but I couldn’t come up with anything ... and that made me happy.
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<br />I mean, ok, I did think, “I’m supposed to go hang out with Jennie on Saturday and my trip to New York with my sister next fall won’t happen,” but as much as I’d love to do those things, they wouldn’t be something that I’d feel were left undone. Do you know what I mean? I thought maybe I’d just gotten sidetracked, so I started praying again and the next thought that came to my mind was, “I won’t get to see Blue Valentine. I heard Ryan Gosling did a great job in that movie.” Seriously? I have no idea why that movie came to mind when there are lots of movies that I still haven’t seen (like being able to see Bella and Edward get married - yes, I DID go there!), but I just kept thinking things like, “I guess I’d miss out on skydiving” and “Nope. Not ever gonna find out what sex is like.” (I know, I know - it’s not all it’s cracked up to be - says those who get to have it whenever they want :P )
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<br />Finally, after all those silly, fun thoughts, something did come to me. I came to the conclusion that the only thing I’ve left undone is to make sure that someone knows that at my funeral, I want God’s love to be front and center. I want my non-Christian friends to come to my funeral and leave KNOWING that God’s love is what made me a happy and content person. I don’t know why God loves us so much, but He has allowed me a brief glimpse into how much He loves me. I’ve been told that I’m a pretty confident person, but all the credit goes to God’s love. If God loves me THAT much, what else matters, really? That’s what I want to come across at my funeral. So, if you’re one of the people that might help plan such an event for me, take note! I’ve tried to live my life not changing how I talk about God to people whether they’re a Christian or not, so hopefully my non-Christian friends get it, but this would be “my” last chance, so when the time comes (obviously it wasn’t Thursday night), I’ll need your help. You in?
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<br />Do you have any loose ends that need to be tied up?
<br />Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-69208281657463085762011-08-26T07:07:00.000-07:002011-08-26T07:20:53.588-07:00Opinions, please!!!<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKNmr9agFAJ1tEnojM2RoUTDS63zJdsuwVryN3dMJ2MoQoqU52iQh3ANoOAT5vu9pUfJ67Gv6U80jCcl4ucaEEs2iFhJlVnbRk91ThtFiIHn1srw2opxZAkYSEgDgHkGS2pMCrOA/s1600/Short-Hairstyle2.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 266px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: pointer" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5644996262147117794" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgKNmr9agFAJ1tEnojM2RoUTDS63zJdsuwVryN3dMJ2MoQoqU52iQh3ANoOAT5vu9pUfJ67Gv6U80jCcl4ucaEEs2iFhJlVnbRk91ThtFiIHn1srw2opxZAkYSEgDgHkGS2pMCrOA/s400/Short-Hairstyle2.jpg" /></a>Ladies, do you think I could pull off a cut like one of these? Be HONEST!!! I really won't be offeneded if you say that you don't think I can. And don't just say YES because you want to see SOMEONE ELSE get the cut! Only say YES if you think it will look half decent on me ... ok, a little more than half decent. Maybe 3/4 decent???
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<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFoVm35IFIgnqyjhVWMOSorJGuLAE6TV0P88NdwIk_J6owLsSJ0ZrzzzV0uqYLw9_ZmgZav4tC8ts_35DvNeFwfM5VacgJQCgw4YGC22dq648xE8jSOO7G0K5HkZ_b5U_4hkJqcw/s1600/Short-Haircut1.png"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 273px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 394px; CURSOR: pointer" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5644996260881006194" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFoVm35IFIgnqyjhVWMOSorJGuLAE6TV0P88NdwIk_J6owLsSJ0ZrzzzV0uqYLw9_ZmgZav4tC8ts_35DvNeFwfM5VacgJQCgw4YGC22dq648xE8jSOO7G0K5HkZ_b5U_4hkJqcw/s400/Short-Haircut1.png" /></a>
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<br /><div>I don't know if I've mentioned it or not, but when I was in Malaysia, I got my hair professionally straightened. Pretty much the reverse perm. It's been great in that I don't have huge fly away hair, but it's done a lot of damage to my hair ... well, to the parts that were colored. I thought to get my hair somewhat healthy again, I'd chop it and since my hair is straighted right now, it might be the best time to do it since it won't be huge and short, causing a mushroom head or helmet head as I like to call them ... but I don't know if I should go as short as the pics above or should I stick with something more like one of these: <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpTcn7_m2sA6sqIltSDtJAIv88gMu5-s3p-kw7OKsbrSOn2QjG4AouMQEe0O1RDWljxWi_z0Ji6uXgQuH3qb56e_zPHv3bAw6TSHXKWSliTnupva08COz6Xi01OYTsgMF98Dl-AQ/s1600/Short-Hairstyle3.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 280px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: pointer" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5644997548930957426" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpTcn7_m2sA6sqIltSDtJAIv88gMu5-s3p-kw7OKsbrSOn2QjG4AouMQEe0O1RDWljxWi_z0Ji6uXgQuH3qb56e_zPHv3bAw6TSHXKWSliTnupva08COz6Xi01OYTsgMF98Dl-AQ/s400/Short-Hairstyle3.jpg" /></a> <a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8qhyF1kANBENq4bE8mY3CccUD_PIe8J81Ry9dTBx4V29nEL7uWeekYRpvst-Y2HkEXvrgwOpVXuuL359sevakGffHPbJQqNmEETKPaz-UP-7M5mD2pvB2vznSpUJlKwp3v1icEw/s1600/Short-Hairstyle4.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 400px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 300px; CURSOR: pointer" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5644998826900831586" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8qhyF1kANBENq4bE8mY3CccUD_PIe8J81Ry9dTBx4V29nEL7uWeekYRpvst-Y2HkEXvrgwOpVXuuL359sevakGffHPbJQqNmEETKPaz-UP-7M5mD2pvB2vznSpUJlKwp3v1icEw/s400/Short-Hairstyle4.jpg" /></a>Remember, honesty is GREATLY appreciated. Oh, and I have no desire to go pixie short, so don't even go there. :P Thanks!</div>
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<br /><div>Update: My hairdresser doesn't think I can do it because my hair is so thick and it'll look like a "mushroom." She used the word I used that I DON'T want to look like. Hmmm, I'm thinking the short short will be a no.</div>
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<br />Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-56195662064568296332011-08-25T00:30:00.000-07:002011-08-25T08:31:06.247-07:00New date!No, silly ... not THAT kind of date! :P
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<br />Well, she finally called me back and my new surgery date is September 28. Thanks to everyone who prayed for me last time. If I can be so bold as to ask for prayers again, can I be specific and ask that you pray that it actually <em>happens</em> this time? :)
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<br />Thanks!
<br />Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-63589403896917911622011-08-21T09:51:00.000-07:002011-08-21T13:20:33.304-07:00Well, that didn't turn out how I thought it would!So, thanks for all your prayers, but apparently we were praying for the wrong thing. Next time, we pray that the surgery actually HAPPENS! Ugh. Here's the long, drawn out story.
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<br />I was told that my arrival time was 10:45. Like a good little girl, I got there at 10:30. Jennie and Nathanael were very punctual picking me up and were allowed to come to the back with me. After I had changed into this lovely outfit, I'd barely walked around the corner and this lady says to me, "Come with me!" I already had my camera in hand because of course I wanted Jennie to take a picture of me in my new get up, but the lady was already walking away. I kinda turned around and said, "One second," and handed Jennie my camera and stood there real quick like. Jennie's like, "Are you coming back?" but I just looked at her like, "I don't know!" You can see the lady turning into that first door behind me, but I didn't know where that led, so we weren't sure what was going on. Little did I know, things don't happen THAT fast around there.
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<br /><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 300px; CURSOR: pointer" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5641315137079521666" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDhgz4C0bRpaBzGg6SsVJUEmBsmZm_jLbs0-U1sSoMzbyIVUF_ctUJuaU0T3tsXsp3E6D5ueLCvjfaF77J9gkvilTnKotjGDwoDbNz3A2jn4EXyirHeWzsYcCfGXdw7qjCO7gxxQ/s400/DSC07985.JPG" />I turned and ran to catch up to her and as I walk into the room she says, "Yeah, you'll be going back." But now I'm already in the room sitting down so I can't jump back out and let Jennie know. I wonder if she was sitting there thinking, "Will I see her again or was that it?" I forgot to ask her that. The nurse takes my blood pressure and asks me a bunch of questions, then tells me that she'll take me outside and start my IV and then the doctor and the anesthesiologist will come and talk to me. Never in that 5 minutes with her did she tell me WHEN all of this would take place. Silly me thought that if I was supposed to be there at 10:45, then surely my surgery would be within half an hour. Did I mention that I've never had surgery before? Yeah, silly me.
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<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBUta5Akr7_xEwSghV1daik235yD_UeK0tQtAgIvqe-LFG4nq00tu8pNEJua7HS0P65GQgq3woEz0Nd-gbwH6ablEZliP6Uj-DNxyYOUjry_afmVH-WuxeJf9FZLvv7TP3zwanrg/s1600/DSC07986.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 300px; CURSOR: pointer" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5641315141349605090" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBUta5Akr7_xEwSghV1daik235yD_UeK0tQtAgIvqe-LFG4nq00tu8pNEJua7HS0P65GQgq3woEz0Nd-gbwH6ablEZliP6Uj-DNxyYOUjry_afmVH-WuxeJf9FZLvv7TP3zwanrg/s400/DSC07986.JPG" /></a>
<br />I don't know if you can see it in the picture above, but they ask you to take out all of your jewellery. Well, I've got a couple of pieces that I can't get out. I thought they'd take wire cutters to them, but they just made me put tape over them (ie, my nose in the picture above).
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<br /><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 300px; CURSOR: pointer" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5641315145240458642" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNRQt3CRPSIQfkjXty2IKpgN_mfyQRa4-4lwArvqqNYTrl3L-LCpT5HOITSf-1OhDURSIUPisbmjBaajV6xqvDj5XcXqKeKMhGvuxbYcqmpJlphKI07YHtZ8OptXn2TLGH8iRsig/s400/DSC07988.JPG" />Time for the IV! Since I've started having a lot of blood work taken to find out what's been going on with me, I've realized that I'm not scared of needles. It didn't hurt at all. It felt weird once she had it in and taped to me because I could feel it move if I moved my hand at all, but it didn't hurt.
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<br />My trusty companions all day. They were such troopers. Thank you SOOOOOOO much Jennie and Nathanael for being there for me. Here were all still smiles because ...
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<br /><div><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 300px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: pointer" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5641315151435088066" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_0YsnEkAE6hTaNuWQrbX_a6bx3LVt4XYMkVXRPgkVb62K5ursAUkA7bcE6FUxm_T34HvQz3gCJFdGSm-zwVrRByoFAdZiBZnr7XnQ6hyphenhyphenGENjc83SNYEWKq6k7BCBJC7QYA_qdBA/s400/DSC07991.JPG" /><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 300px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: pointer" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5641315663843597506" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMOj6rCnh8FPOgew9MqOroGJxEtKAOgL6IXE5muJKRmBgzJbSgm4PE7PrDXfFkl8JDWXEQKaszGiGkMiQ2t9vEU7EuyTW1U5_YMa23_kdUZKqG96HdFrMI0j8zsGlNj5c4vA8nWg/s400/DSC07995.JPG" /></div>
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<br /><div>It was still only half an hour into our day!</div>
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<br /><div>Here I am all ready to go!
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<br /><div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAhUkupGLVHoqA8hhQeplzOjChpLbnx5ZStwhcotHIhwyTqUdS3CXfw0lg4lgmY228EoAJMdOEpE9rSF8zUFRNrKFeaxjPsWKZy3x1hrw2dkn_kat5xltAStiHeZNAo98tJ3Vi5A/s1600/DSC07994.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 300px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: pointer" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5641314072858185666" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAhUkupGLVHoqA8hhQeplzOjChpLbnx5ZStwhcotHIhwyTqUdS3CXfw0lg4lgmY228EoAJMdOEpE9rSF8zUFRNrKFeaxjPsWKZy3x1hrw2dkn_kat5xltAStiHeZNAo98tJ3Vi5A/s400/DSC07994.JPG" /></a>And again, still smiling ...</div>
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<br /><div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBzEPRV3ShD7ZNFZ7wB417aARjuLKpR_R16oYGWEmkZsllHpZn6Alw3UVtB_f2bslgxzzmpPNqcGJ7lxNTGh0sInxqFWaxyC4wFt70z2wjTKCyP84UaYx-nr5DUe3h6LzFzWulxQ/s1600/DSC07996.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 300px; CURSOR: pointer" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5641313494279460962" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBzEPRV3ShD7ZNFZ7wB417aARjuLKpR_R16oYGWEmkZsllHpZn6Alw3UVtB_f2bslgxzzmpPNqcGJ7lxNTGh0sInxqFWaxyC4wFt70z2wjTKCyP84UaYx-nr5DUe3h6LzFzWulxQ/s400/DSC07996.JPG" /></a>Bren stopped by for a visit before noon and brought me 3 magazines. Thanks, Bren!
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<br /><div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4zsCC8FFkSERKLl-jRVMZYIqlXAJq74mWwB0fSnzqH3iAD0YKu6on-2lnel68fCOV_HMCWuzB4QHsNzBoKNCiGR0gTaOm1BkE4LoOGgxsyt-p53yUXa42S789xsWQ7n6cC0NX5A/s1600/DSC07997.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 300px; CURSOR: pointer" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5641313202981021362" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4zsCC8FFkSERKLl-jRVMZYIqlXAJq74mWwB0fSnzqH3iAD0YKu6on-2lnel68fCOV_HMCWuzB4QHsNzBoKNCiGR0gTaOm1BkE4LoOGgxsyt-p53yUXa42S789xsWQ7n6cC0NX5A/s400/DSC07997.JPG" /></a>After Bren left, it started to feel like we'd been waiting a reeeeeeeeeeaaaaalllllly long time. I stopped one of the nurses who was setting up IV stands next to me and said, "Do you know if my doctor's behind and if so, how far behind?" She said that he was about an hour behind, to which I asked, "Do you know when my surgery was supposed to be?" She asked what time I was told to be here and when I told her, she said, "Your usually asked to be here 2 hours before your surgery." WHAT? That would've been nice to know. I had no idea that I'd be waiting AT LEAST 2 hours. Again, have I mentioned I'd never had surgery before? At least now I knew I'd be waiting 3 hours, since the doc was an hour behind. </div>
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<br /><div>The TV was on in the waiting area right next to us, so I kinda strained my next to see what was on. First, it was something like a World Vision program. Dying, starving kids. It was really quite sad ... but maybe they were trying to make us feel better since we weren't allowed to have eaten anything since midnight so we wouldn't be complainers. Point taken.</div>
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<br /><div>The next time I looked up at the TV, there was a silent movie on. Yeah, you read that right, a SILENT MOVIE! Did you even know they aired those things anymore? I sure didn't. There was someone in the waiting room and one of the nurses standing up close to the TV watching it ... looking super into it! That made me laugh. I watched and made fun for awhile because their expressions were priceless and then the words would come on the screen, "I am the master here. You will do what I say!" Oh my. Then they showed this guy who looked like a cave man and the word "Idiot" kept being played over top of his face. "Idiot. Idiot. Idiot." I turned to Jennie and said, "What kind of a movie IS this?" But by now I was hooked and it was something to pass the time, so I kept watching. Then Idiot started chasing the rich looking girl around the house and she would stop every once in awhile and scream. I didn't think this was going to end well, but finally the cavalry came and saved her, but when they asked her what they should do with Idiot, she said, "He's innocent. Let him go." WHAT? True, I'd only started watching 3/4 of the way though the movie, so I didn't see the relationship develop between these two, but that was odd. That movie ended with him being extremely grateful to her and her saying, "You'll always have a place with us, Igor." Oh yeah, his name was Igor, not Idiot.</div>
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<br /><div>A 2nd silent movie started but the nurse, instead of changing the channel, turned the TV off! What??? It was SUPER quiet in there after that and Jennie and I were starting to get a little weary by this time ... well, I know I was. Then one of the nurses comes into our area and says, "Is anyone here a really big Stanley Cup fan?" We just looked at her like, "What? Why do you ask that?" She says, "The Stanley Cup is here and if you go to the end of the hall, you can look down to the lobby and see it." Knowing that Jennie is a HUGE hockey fan, I told her, "GO! You have to see it!" She grabbed Nathanael and off they went. I sat there for about a minute and then thought, "Nuts! I've been waiting now for about 3 hours. If they come out while I'm gone, THEY can wait a minute or two while I go take a look at the Stanley Cup," so up I got in my cute little gown and trotted down the hallway pushing my IV and this is what I saw:
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<br /><div><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi38Mx5c_Q2goYEW61YOOwQOhNoJaZVivFI1dyuUUafF4KrPXCr9xHgWNRxyHZnsbFhHBIz404uRISgYSENggacHIq0ueo4RIBR27sDZIknj5BaZp5QC7zr-tK5lhlalalUXMpA3A/s1600/IMG_0737.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 224px; CURSOR: pointer" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5641312926836340738" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi38Mx5c_Q2goYEW61YOOwQOhNoJaZVivFI1dyuUUafF4KrPXCr9xHgWNRxyHZnsbFhHBIz404uRISgYSENggacHIq0ueo4RIBR27sDZIknj5BaZp5QC7zr-tK5lhlalalUXMpA3A/s400/IMG_0737.JPG" /></a>It was pretty cool, actually! I'm so glad that Jennie could experience it, too. How random was that? I hadn't heard that it was going to be in Abbotsford (apparently one of the coaches on the Boston Bruins is from Abbotsford). Jennie said she'd read that it was going to be in Abbotsford, but couldn't remember where it was going to be. A case of being at the right place at the right time? I don't think so. I think God knew we'd need a little pick me up that day.
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<br /><div><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 225px; CURSOR: pointer" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5641317386926712834" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidW07u0xsPOwECek3KcVF7XEwKsRnane-Yh2MOgbVc6CvSHHK5L28pbFnLBBZsIVQjPV5wX-Tpb5eXk6RPOTXCDUCYwtUMd474U9_kdVpuAPxO9AGCpeUJVn0HxbtrdzMNZwlzRg/s400/IMG_0737a.jpg" /></div></div>
<br />After this momentary excitement, we went back to our previous positions (see picture number 7) and continued on with our waiting. A nurse had come out and talked to me about pre surgical stuff and asked me a bunch of questions, so in my mind, it was a go.
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<br />At about 2:15, the same nurse that asked if we were Stanley Cup fans, asks me, "Are you going in anytime soon?" With a quizzical look on my face I said to her, "I thought you'd be the one who could tell ME that!" She said, "It can't be too much longer now. The nurse already came out to talk to you, so it must be your turn soon." I said, "As long as I don't get bumped, I'll be happy." Both her and the other nurse were completely quiet for about 5 seconds after I said that (which seemed like forever) and then they were like, "No, I'm sure you'll go in anytime now."
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<br />Well, about 15 minutes later, Jennie says to me, "I don't have a good feeling about this." All morning as Jennie was nervous and said she's been cleaning her house like mad, her feelings didn't transfer to me. I was totally calm. I thought maybe when I got to the hospital I'd get more nervous. Nope. Maybe when they put the IV in I'd get more nervous. Nope. But when Jennie said, "I don't have a good feeling about this," I believed her. I started to get that sinking feeling. We'd already seen one person get bumped today (he was quite the character as well, but I won't go into those details), so who's to say it wouldn't happen again. Then, we see a nurse come from behind "the" doors, she grabs my chart, Jennie and I are thinking, "This is it!" she walks over to the Stanley Cup nurse (yes, that's her name) and I see the nurse's hands fly up to her face in an "OH NO!" pose. Jennie and I just looked at each other and said, "Oh crap."
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<br />Yup. You guessed it. I got bumped. The nurses were all SUPER apologetic. They explained to me that the doctor had had a very serious cancer case in the morning that had gone longer than expected and then the gallbladder right before mine had taken longer than expected as well and they were going to have to reschedule me. I KNOW that cancer trumps gallbladder so I wasn't upset about that and I tried to be gracious ... especially because it was NONE of their faults, so I pretty much stood up and asked for the IV to be taken out right away so I could go get myself something to eat. I was STARVING!!! Ok, not World Vision child starving, but you know when you can't have it, you want it even more? Yeah, that feeling (and since the cute doctor who'd come out with a sandwich earlier in the day had decided to torture me by waving his sandwich around in front of me hadn't shared with me, I was really thinking about some food at this point).
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<br />I'm not sure which thought went through my head first: food or "I have to go to work tomorrow!" but they were pretty close to each other. I think I was more disappointed because I'd already had my date changed once so technically, this was my 2nd bump and rearranging things at work is kind of a pain. I'd gotten myself all psyched up for 2 weeks off work and now ... back to work. And I LIKE my job and my supervisor!
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<br />Anyway, Jennie and I went and grabbed some food (the new Thai Chicken burger at McD's is quite good, btw - no, I wasn't TRYING to bring on an attack so I'd end up in emerg and they'd HAVE to do the surgery like my Mom thought) and then I made the phone call to the doctor's office to reschedule. The girl in the office sounded quite flustered when I called so I asked her if she wanted to call me back. She said "yes" and that it would most likely be tomorrow. Well, it's now Sunday and I still don't have my new date. She did inform me that the doctor was going on holidays, so it wouldn't be until September sometime. Of course it won't.
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<br />Again, thanks for all your prayers. I know I'm extremely blessed to have you all praying for me and that I haven't had an attack since May. I don't know if I would've been able to handle the disappointment if I'd still been continuously having attacks and NEEDED it out NOW!
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<br />I'll keep you all informed when I hear any news. Thanks again!
<br />Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-7237577958187494362011-08-15T09:17:00.000-07:002011-08-15T09:28:50.947-07:00Surgery day!Today I get that darned gallbladder taken out. I've washed with the antiseptic soap (twice - once last night and once this morning ... they must think I'm awfully dirty!) and now I'm all itchy, but I'm not allowed to put any lotion on.
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<br />I haven't had an attack since May 17, so I'm not sure what's going on ... have my gallstones disappeared ... did I pass them? What? Strange.
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<br />I've taken a picture of my stomach without any scars. Yes, I've been told that the scars will be very small, but I've never had surgery or any major scars before so this is all new to me.
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<br />I had a dream last night that I was in the OR (that's operating room for those of you who don't know ... I learned that when I watched ER - that's a TV show short for Emergency Room ;P ), lying on my side and that they were operating through my back. I could hear everything they were saying and could feel some tugging, but no pain. When I woke up, I started thinking about that movie Awake where the guy (Hayden Christensen) is awake during surgery but paralyzed by the anesthetic so he can't tell them that he's feeling everything they're doing. Ok, not the best thought before going under. I'm <em>sure</em> that won't happen to me, right???
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<br />Gotta go pack a bag in case the surgery doesn't go well laparoscipically and they have to open me up. If that happens, I'll be in the hospital for a few nights, but it's very rare, so I'm sure I'll be home later this afternoon and tomorrow I can let you all know how I'm doing.
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<br />Thanks for your prayers!
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<br />Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-14730131792513086642011-07-18T06:40:00.000-07:002011-07-18T08:27:18.192-07:00Movie MondayIt's difficult to understand the sum of a person's life. Some people will tell you it's measured by the one's left behind. Some believe it can be measured in faith. Some say by love. Other folks say life has no meaning at all. Me? I believe that you measure yourself by the people who measured themselves by you. What I can tell you for sure is that by any measure, Edward Cole lived more in his last days on earth than most people manage to wring out of a lifetime. I know that when he died, his eyes were closed and his heart was open.<br /><br /><br /><p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_2cgTUi1IK6uFsDQ6bbMkXxegMZiUPIqOLtjMiCe5p-Kn2HigDxwW8BBHiO0pxIUY7teCCRiGXIIxIpbmpeIdee5IIpO1KJtTVjp04FWM8xZjeOus7tTyzy-TDKGBJuOpWAOjTA/s1600/the-bucket-list.jpg"><span style="COLOR: rgb(0,0,0)"></span><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5629976959167692338" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 270px; CURSOR: pointer; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_2cgTUi1IK6uFsDQ6bbMkXxegMZiUPIqOLtjMiCe5p-Kn2HigDxwW8BBHiO0pxIUY7teCCRiGXIIxIpbmpeIdee5IIpO1KJtTVjp04FWM8xZjeOus7tTyzy-TDKGBJuOpWAOjTA/s400/the-bucket-list.jpg" border="0" /></a>Those are the first words you hear when watching The Bucket List. It intrigued me right off the bat. I wondered, "Is my heart open? What is the sum of my life?" I was really interested to see where this movie went. Sure, there are cheesey parts and it's a shame that they used a green screen in so many scenes instead of actually going to the locations they're supposed to be in the movie (safari in Africa, the pyramids in Egypt, Taj Mahal in India and even something as simple as driving a race car), but I liked the overall idea of the movie.<br /><br />They both find out they have cancer and have about a year to live, so they make a list of things they'd like to do before kicking the bucket ... hence, The Bucket List. Morgan Freeman's character puts things down like:<br /><br /><strong>See something truly majestic</strong><strong><br /><br />Help a complete stranger for the good<br /><br />Laugh until I cry </p></strong><br /><p></p><br />Jack Nicholson's character puts things down like:<br /><br /><strong>Skydiving</strong><strong><br /><br />Kiss the most beautiful girl in the world<br /><br />Get a tattoo <br /><p></p></strong>Which leads Carter (MF) to say to Edward (JN), "Is that the sum of your ambition? Edward, I've taken baths deeper than you."<br /><br />I thought that was a pretty good line, however, in my opinion, if you're going to make a bucket list, I think it's ok to have fun things like that on it.<br /><br />Later on in the movie, when they're sitting at the top of a pyramid (yeah, right!), Carter tells Edward that the ancient Egyptians had a beautiful belief about getting to the entrance to Heaven. When their souls arrived, they were asked two questions and their answers determined whether they were admitted or not.<br /><br />1) Have you found joy in your life?<br />2) Has your life brought joy to others?<br /><br />Wow! Those are 2 awesome questions! Think about them. Read them again. I can honestly say yes to the first question which brings me ... what else? ... JOY! And the answer to question #2? Well, I think we'd all like to answer the way Edward answers by saying, "Ask them."<br /><br />But be honest with yourself. Has your life brought joy to others? My answer is this ... I believe so. For the most part, I've surrounded myself with people who bring me joy and in turn, they inspire me to do the same. Edward's answer is probably right in that we can't truly answer for someone else. People have to choose joy. I may try to bring people joy, but they have to choose to receive it. I think if you were a grumpy, bitter, curmudgeon and were asked that question, you'd have to answer no, so if you're mostly a pleasant person, why wouldn't your answer be yes? Because it seems arrogant to answer yes? Maybe, but who cares! I do think that we can always strive to be better people, though, so let's not get carried away on being high on ourselves. ;)<br /><br />This movie, to me, was about three things.<br /><br />1) Being a good friend<br /><br />One of the last lines in the movie is this ... "I'm deeply proud that this man found it worth his while to know me." I am so grateful to have so many people in my life worth knowing. You have inspired me, encouraged me, cried with me, served with me, been silent with me, laughed with me and gone on many adventures with me (whether abroad or right in our own backyards). I lost a friend recently and it was very sudden. I hadn't told him what he meant to me and I'll forever be sorry for that. His facebook wall was inundated with amazing comments about what a great person he was. I know that no one's going to say something bad about someone at a time like this, but they could've just said simple things. Instead, they went on and on about his character, his encouraging words and how much he'll be missed. It's really made me want to be a better person. We should all aspire to have those things said about us when we pass away.<br /><br />2) How do I want to be remembered<br /><br />This pretty much ties in with what I said at the end of #2. What kind of legacy do you want to leave behind? What do you want people to say about you when you're gone? Then start living it NOW! It's not good enough just to think about it. Do it! And I'm pointing the finger at myself here as well. Just like choosing joy, it's a daily choice to be a nice person when you wake up in the morning. Granted, for some people it's an easier choice than for others (why is that, anyway?), but we really do have a choice.<br /><br />3) Take risks and try new things<br /><br />The other day I saw this quote: "Begin at once to live, and count each separate day as a separate life." - Seneca. Count each day as a separate life. I like that. Some things will definitely be worth the risk and others won't, but at least you'll have put yourself out there and tried. Going back to the beginning of this post, when I die, I want my eyes to be closed and my heart to be open, however, I also want to LIVE with my heart open.<br /><br />Overall, I'd definitely recommend this movie. Is it JN's or MF's best acting jobs? No. But it's the message that counts and this is a good one.<br /><br />So, my question for you is:<br /><br /><strong><span style="color:#330099;">What's on your Bucket List?</span></strong> <br /><p></p>Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-8603186479065800982011-07-08T16:56:00.000-07:002011-07-08T16:56:00.350-07:00Hello July!!!I realize that I've been quite absent for awhile and for that, I'm sorry ... however, you know I was gone for the month of May and the month of June? Forget about it! I returned home from overseas on June 3, forced myself to stay awake until 9pm, crashed for 10 hours, got up, repacked a small bag and headed out the door with 2 friends for Seattle. Why Seattle? I'm glad you asked. I went to see THE BEST BAND IN THE WORLD!!! If you have to ask which band that is, you're new to my blog, aren't you?<br /><br />U2 of course!!!<br /><br />Had a GREAT time at the concert, stayed overnight, walked around Seattle the next day and tried my new favoritest ice cream in the world (will explain more in a later post), came home early evening on Sunday (still working on jet lag, don't forget), had errands and plans Monday and Tuesday, did NOTHING on Wednesday and then back to work on Thursday. <br /><br />Friday after work I packed ANOTHER small bag and headed up to Whistler for the weekend with 3 friends. Man, Whistler's beautiful!!!<br /><br />Another week of work (just about kicked jet lag by this point ... with a few up-until-3am nights in there), then had a friend come up from Seattle and stay at my place all weekend ... we went and saw Wicked (really great, but the A/C wasn't working so it was like a SAUNA in there!!!) and then on Sunday did another trip into Vancouver to pick up my sister's dog at the airport and transfer him to another airline and send him off to Calgary for my parents to pick him up.<br /><br />Another week of work (finally kicked the jet lag) and then headed down to Snohomish and Seattle to visit some friends, which brings us to last weekend where I GLADLY welcomed the month of July because I only have one or two things planned!!!<br /><br />Don't get me wrong. I loved everything I did in the months of May and June, but I'm exhausted!!!<br /><br />I'll try to start updating again, but that's the quick version of the last month ... all of which my pics are on Facebook and most of you have commented on, so I think I'll just leave this one as a wordy update. :P<br /><br />I'm happy to be back!Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-81984418988761597252011-05-16T03:27:00.000-07:002011-05-16T03:28:11.415-07:00Travel tips/Things to Know1. When choosing reading material for your trip, make sure to bring a book that wraps up nicely ... or bring the sequel along. There's nothing worse than getting all caught up in some characters only to be slapped with a big, ole "To be continued ... " at the end. :(<br /><br />2. This one's mostly for the ladies, but you'll find yourself doing your hair differently or wearing things you'd NEVER find yourself wearing back home. I wish I had a picture to show you of this thing I've been wearing on my head, but the benefits of traveling alone are that there ARE no pics! I am kinda sad that I left my fisherman's pants at home because again, although I wouldn't wear them at home, they're super comfortable and "fashionable" amongst travelers.<br /><br />3. When buying trail mix for a snack, make sure there's no chocolate in it. Makes for a very messy situation when in warm climates.<br /><br />4. Don't forget to put suntan lotion INSIDE your ears. Yup. They will burn and it'll hurt to put in your ear buds to listen to your iPod later. If you do forget, still do it the next day even though it hurts like a bugger. You'll thank me later.<br /><br />5. You'll start getting a British accent - or at the very least, an accent not your own. Let me explain (granted, this may just happen to me). English is the common language (fortunately, for me), however, from my experience, a lot of ESL people have learned English from the proper British, therefore, when they speak it, they kinda sound British (at least to me they do). Lately, I've found myself when talking to someone from Holland (met a nice couple from there today ... thought of you, Bren), let's say, that all of a sudden sentences all sound like questions and just generally sound different. If I say it the way I'm used to, a lot of times people don't understand you ... but put on the British accent and they get it! I haven't said "Ta" or "Cheers" yet, but I have found myself saying "Reckon" (not with the southern US drawl, but again, the British accent). Ok, like I said, maybe this one's just me.<br /><br />6. When ordering a cheeseburger, it's best not to ask until after you've eaten it what kind of meat they made the patty with.<br /><br />7. You'll most likely get so relaxed that the very thought of going back to work will make you want to "accidentally" lose your passport ... then you remember that you have to work to make more money and go do this again, and the panic attack passes.<br /><br />8. Canadians are very polite. It's not like that everywhere ... but sometimes it's part of that country's charm, in a weird way.<br /><br />9. Don't let your left side turn towards the sun today ... oh sorry. That one's just for me. :P<br /><br />10. When the "captain" tells you, "Jump in here and you see turtle" or "Jump in here and you see shark" do it, even if you're scared! I did it! Can you believe it? I hardly can!!! :)<br /><br />11. Talk to people around you. Most of them will be interested to hear where you're from, where you've been and to tell you good places to see and things to do. If they don't feel like talking, you'll figure that out pretty quickly and you can move on to the next person/people.<br /><br />AND LASTLY ...<br /><br />12. You can't outrun the Biebster. They play him in the airports, hotel lobby's and even little restaurants on practically deserted islands. I know some of you will be happy about this, but I thought I'd warn the rest of you. You're welcome.Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-31782655599250574162011-05-14T01:48:00.000-07:002011-05-14T01:49:56.767-07:00The Things I'm Thankful For Over The Last 24 hoursThank You, Lord, that as I was reading my book on the beach and watching the sunset (yes, you can do both simultaneously), I "happened" to look behind me when I heard a rustling. My eyes weren't sure what they saw, so I had to take a closer look. It looked like a badger, but with the talons of a bat. It was a flying squirrel. A gentleman passing by saw me looking up into the tree and asked, "Anything interesting?" We stood and watched 2 flying squirrels hop their way to the top of the tree and eventually jump/fly down. Very, very cool.<br /> <br />Thank You, Lord that I "happened" to wake up at 5:30 this morning and look outside and see a crazy lightening storm ... with no rain ... even better.<br /> <br />Thank You, Lord, that when I set out on what I thought was going to be a short excursion today, I "happened" to think to take my sarong to cover my shoulders so I wouldn't get more burnt. My excursion ended up lasting 4 hours, so I'm glad I had it along.<br /> <br />Thank You, Lord, that I've learned to look behind me when I hear rustling and again, "happened" to turn around and see a monitor lizard slowly walking down the path towards where I was laying on the beach.<br /> <br />Thank You, Lord, that as I was setting up my self timer on my camera to take a picture, that I "happened" to see a "stick" move and "happened" to look at it more closely to see it was really a snake (the equivalent to what we'd call a Gardener snake - is that how it's spelled?"). And thank You, Lord that I "happened" to get a National Geographic moment as I looked closer and saw that it had a little lizard in it's mouth. Thank You, Lord, that my battery on my camera "happened" to die right AFTER I'd watched this circle of life moment so I could capture most of it on my camera. The reason I was setting up my self timer was because the beach I was on was completely deserted. I literally felt like I was a castaway all alone. Kinda cool and creepy at the same time.<br /><br />Thank You, Lord, that when I got back to my hut and wanted to relax by listening to some music, U2's "Beautiful Day" "happened" to play when I put it on shuffle.<br /> <br />Thank You, Lord, that I don't believe in happenstances. Thank YOU for a GREAT day!<br /> <br />Oh, and thanks for banana/pineapple smoothies. :)Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-37604412387898529272011-05-13T01:46:00.000-07:002011-05-14T01:47:53.816-07:00What I Know About the Perhentian Island so far ...By the time I arrived on the Perhentian Islands, I was soaked and thought we were going to capsize about 3 times from the boat ride over. The poor sap beside me had only just met me and yet I grabbed his arm every time I thought we were going over. It's ok. We're fast friends now and he's most likely going to come visit tomorrow. haha - don't you love meeting other travelers?<br /><br />My room smells like urine and the sheets are stained.<br /><br />I've got a chicken and her baby chick living under my hut and a nosy squirrel constantly staring at me.<br /><br />I've got no hot water and the bathroom leaves much to be desired.<br /><br />And you know what? ... I LOVE IT ALL!!!<br /><br />I'm not kidding. <br /><br />This place is BEA-U-TI-FUL!!! The water is so clear that when I stand on the dock, I can see all the colourful fish ... I don't even NEED to go snorkeling! The sand is so soft and white that it squeaks under my feet. Last night I was sitting on the beach just people watching and I looked to the south and watched the coolest storm roll in. Once it passed, the air felt fresher and less humid.<br /><br />I slept for 10 hours!!! How is that possible? Why can't I ever sleep that long at home? I'm not going to think about it right now. I'm just going to enjoy it.<br /><br />Here are a few other things I've learned:<br /><br />I should've applied more sunscreen today. Oh well. That just means I won't have my back to the sun at all tomorrow. It'll be a front facing day. So, I make an adjustment. No big deal.<br /><br />Yes, travelling alone has it's lonely moments, but I haven't once felt that I'm holding anyone up while I stop and take my MILLION pictures or take a super long shower. I haven't felt like I've disappointed anyone by simply wanting to sit and read my book for 5 hours straight instead of "doing" something.<br /><br />To sum it up, I'm having a GREAT time! This is the life. I'm telling ya. And I've still got 3 full days of it ... looking forward to doing more of nothing. :) Then I'm on to my sisters and I just learned she's got a pool in her complex ... I guess a few more lazy days are in my future before the grad festivities start up.<br /><br />Hope you're all well. I do wish you were here. Oh, a rooster just walked by the door ... did I mention I saw a monkey in the tree above the restaurant earlier as well? Yeah, pretty darn cool.Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-35218805824944106102011-04-25T07:10:00.000-07:002011-04-25T07:18:18.083-07:00Less than 2 weeksPsalm 121:5-7 "The Lord is your protector, there at your right side to shade you from the sun. You won’t be harmed by the sun during the day or by the moon at night. The Lord will protect you and keep you safe from all dangers." (CEV)<br /><br />I had another attack last night. It wasn't fun, but just as I started worrying about it happening during my trip, I read the verse above. It's all in His hands. He will protect me and I have to trust in that. <br /><br />On another note ... as much as I'm thankful for my new phone and that I can get internet on it and update Facebook and my blog, typing anything too long can be a real pain on this teeny keyboard, so that's all from me for now. :PFionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31918381.post-77690138127376765282011-04-24T07:37:00.000-07:002011-04-24T07:41:42.435-07:00Happy Easter!!!Christianity happens when men and women accept with unwavering trust that their sins have not only been forgiven, but forgotten, washed away in the blood of the Lamb. Thus, my friend archbishop Joe Reia says, "A sad Christian is a phony, and a guilty Christian is no Christian at all.".Fionahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17878708545575863115noreply@blogger.com0